In a dramatic twist worthy of a political soap opera, Zanu-PF spokesperson Christopher Mutsvangwa has launched a veiled salvo at Vice-President Constantino Chiwenga, cautioning that targeting controversial business moguls could derail the ruling party’s empowerment agenda and economic progress.

Speaking to reporters in Harare, Mutsvangwa accused unnamed “detractors” within the party of sowing discord, following reports that Chiwenga clashed with senior officials during a recent politburo meeting. The vice-president reportedly raised concerns about the outsized influence of business tycoons accused of capturing the state, particularly Wicknell Chivayo and Kudakwashe Tagwirei.

Chiwenga allegedly presented a dossier detailing Tagwirei’s alleged shady dealings and questioned Chivayo’s lavish donations of cars and cash exceeding US$4 million during President Emmerson Mnangagwa’s recent birthday bash. In a move that could only be described as a luxury vehicle avalanche, Tagwirei gifted over 300 high-end cars to Zanu-PF central committee members just last week.

“There are persistent efforts from detractors who are throwing cobwebs for us to witch hunt ourselves,” Mutsvangwa said, sounding like a madzibaba warning of mamhepo. “They want to push an agenda that only a colonial economy can function. We have shown that we can defy that false narrative.”

Mutsvangwa insisted that any corruption claims should be handed over to law enforcement, dismissing media focus on what Chiwenga has dubbed “zvigananda” , a new breed of politically connected businesspeople with mysteriously fat wallets.

“If you have corruption allegations and evidence against Kudakwashe Tagwirei, then go to the police and the Zimbabwe Anti-Corruption Commission,” Mutsvangwa charged. “We are not distracted by these zvigananda, which the media is publishing. The politburo is not unduly moved by those things.”

In a surprising twist, Mutsvangwa, who once accused Tagwirei of trying to buy his way into the central committee, appeared to soften his stance. He also threw his weight behind gold dealer Scott Sakupwanya, hailing him as a shining beacon of youth empowerment under Mnangagwa’s policies.

“President Mnangagwa killed the smuggling of gold. Zimbabwe is producing 51 tonnes of gold per annum,” Mutsvangwa declared. “Young people like Scott Sakupwanya are ensuring that small-scale miners get a fair price for their gold.”

On the succession front, Mutsvangwa waded into the murky waters, saying it was Mnangagwa’s prerogative to decide whether to extend his rule beyond 2028. He noted that those pushing the so-called “2030 agenda” were exercising their democratic rights.

“People are simply saying that when the time comes, enter the ring and who wins, wins. Zanu-PF is a mass party,” he said, as if announcing the next season of a political reality show.

Mutsvangwa also accused unnamed party insiders of trying to stir conflict between Mnangagwa and his deputies. “I picked up about these people. They will always be there in the revolutionary party and invariably it is about trying to distract, confuse and deviate the party,” he warned.

With tensions simmering and rumors swirling that Tagwirei might be Mnangagwa’s chosen successor, the political drama within Zanu-PF promises to keep the nation on the edge of its seat as the 2027 congress approaches. Meanwhile, one can only wonder if the next politburo meeting will feature even more luxury car giveaways or perhaps a surprise dance-off to settle scores.

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