In a saga more befitting a political sitcom than real life, former Foreign Affairs Minister Walter Mzembi now a guest of remand prison—reportedly made his way back to Zimbabwe entirely on his own steam. No secret agents, no cloak-and-dagger antics, and absolutely no magic carrots involved, insists Sabhuku Temba Mliswa.

Mzembi, denied bail while facing criminal abuse of office charges, had been on a grand exile tour through South Africa and Zambia before deciding to stage his dramatic return. Rumors, however, spun faster than a cyclone in a teacup, with some wild theories suggesting Mliswa masterminded a covert “spy vs spy” operation to lure him back.

Mliswa swiftly doused those fanciful flames, labeling such claims “noonday hogwash” in a fiery social media proclamation. According to him, Mzembi’s return was purely his own bright idea,a plan hatched after a spectacular political fallout with former ally Kasukuwere. Their friendship imploded so thoroughly that Mzembi felt safer hopping countries rather than sticking around.

“Mzembi came to me for help,” Mliswa explained, “and I just played postman between him and the powers that be no cloak, no dagger, just good old-fashioned politicking.” He also scoffed at accusations of being a CIO operative, dismissing keyboard warriors like Ali Naka as “guns for hire” spinning nonsense for a quick meal.

So here’s the twist: Mzembi, haunted by Kasukuwere’s shadow, cooked up his own return and enlisted Mliswa as his reluctant facilitator. No spies, no espionage ,just a messy political breakup and a man wanting to come home.

As Mliswa puts it, “I’ve always pushed for exiles to come back. When Mzembi and Kasukuwere wanted back in 2018, I was just the messenger. Whatever deals they made, I wasn’t on the guest list.”

In this political drama, the biggest surprise is that sometimes, people simply make their own choices—no cloak-and-dagger required.

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